This week's Bill Maher CTTW montage needs no introduction and no comment. All I will say is that for those of us who find her words to be both hilarious and maddening, misery loves company!
Thanks Bill.
Oh dear, this video has been de-activated. I'm trying to find a new link, it'll be posted as soon as found. If you know of any working link to this funny montage, please comment here!
ChristineHex
Yes, this is a political witch hunt, but this blog has no direct or indirect ties to, financial relationship with or communication with any electoral campaign. Beware the witch's hex!
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Delaware Debate Highlights - "Oh Gosh, um..." don't ask me those fancy pants questions, I'm just a simple country Senate candidate! "What I believe is irrelevant"
The factually challenged Christine got a chance to show off her brain-smarts last night, and there's laughs aplenty for fans like us.
"Oh gosh... give me an example..."
You may have already seen the headline moment, when Christine couldn't name a single recent supreme court ruling that she disagrees with after she asserted that "activist judges" are generally causing havoc and wrecking everything. If she is so concerned with judicial overreach, should she not have an example? Should she not at least be able to name one?
She says the US "didn't finish the job" when we were "fighting the Soviets in Afghanistan".... and that "now we have a responsibility to finish the job." whatever that means. Defeating the Soviets? Killing every living thing in the country? What does she think "finishing the job" means?
Hmmmm.... well, what happened in Christine's imagination is pretty much the opposite of what really happened historically.
The Soviets pulled out in 1989, leaving our guys in charge. These US allies, "Freedom Fighters" (as Reagan called them) armed to the teeth with American weapons and money, did not disappear, nor were they defeated by the Soviet Union. Instead they stayed in charge, which was the US military objective under Reagan, and you might know them. At the time they were called "Mujahadeen" but you might know them better as "Al Quaida" or "The Taliban" both of which grew out of Reagan's "freedom fighters" movements, and today are fighting our soldiers over there with weapons supplied by our own government.
Another classic Christine whopper came in the midst of a confused and kooky tangent in which she continued to pursue her accusation that her opponent is a "Bearded Marxist". For one thing, Coons pointed out, he's "not now, nor have I ever been, anything but a clean-shaven capitalist!"
Apparently her argument is that he must be a Marxist because "when you look at his position on things like raising taxes, which is one of the tenets of Marxism, not supporting eliminating the death tax, which is a tenet of Marxism -- I would argue that there are more people who support my Catholic faith than his Marxist beliefs,"
Where to begin? Firstly, there are many Communist Catholics. I visited their large Catholic churches in Communist Cuba a few years back when Fidel Castro was still president. The worshippers I met there told me they love Cuba's communist system as it keeps them fed, housed, employed and medically cared for for life, and in todays modern world has long ago legalized their religious practices which despite being previously frowned upon are now officially considered a valued part of Cuba's cultural heritage.
Here in the USA you may be familiar with socialist and radically pacifist catholic groups that have been active and prominent for over a hundred years, such as the Catholic Worker, the Ploughshares movement, and many more.
Secondly, since when did "raising taxes" become "one of the tenets of Marxism"?!
I've read the Communist Manifesto and Das Kapital, and no-where in either of his classic works does Marx say anything about raising taxes.
Actually Marx called for worker ownership and control of all resources and production facilities. In a Marxist society, all profits from large scale organized economic activity are shared by the workers and allocated by their Soviet committees... oh well, no point trying to explain economic theories to someone who chooses to be anti-intellectual and rejects book-learnin' in general.
And here's a doozy. We all know Christine says women and girls who have been victims of rape and incest should not be allowed to get an abortion but should be legally forced to give birth to their rapists baby, their fathers baby or whatever. Equal rights for sperm! Menstruation is murder... ok, she didn't say that, but logically her ideas are equivalent to those extreme caricature statements.
So she says it's a "scare tactic" to bring up rape and incest because they constitute (according to her) "one percent of all abortions performed in America." So rape victims rights are not important because they are in the minority? 25% of all American women are raped in their lifetimes. So 25% of women, Christine says you are a "scare tactic"
I'll leave you for a moment with a pretty good little CBS summary, including some great quotes from naked transparent lies and idiocy such as on China's secret invasion plans she said on TV she knew about "They misquoted me at the time I believe"... you misquoted yourself?!
And the simply brilliant "What I believe is irrelevant" (regarding her belief that evolution is a myth) She and many of her opponents agree that her more whacky beliefs and factually questionable statements are "irrelevant" but here at CTTW we beg to differ.
When someone is a US Senator, their beliefs, their intelligence, their education and their honesty or dishonesty are of the utmost importance to all of us.
We need to know what our leaders think and believe because they make our laws.
How is this irrelevant?
"Oh gosh... give me an example..."
You may have already seen the headline moment, when Christine couldn't name a single recent supreme court ruling that she disagrees with after she asserted that "activist judges" are generally causing havoc and wrecking everything. If she is so concerned with judicial overreach, should she not have an example? Should she not at least be able to name one?
She says the US "didn't finish the job" when we were "fighting the Soviets in Afghanistan".... and that "now we have a responsibility to finish the job." whatever that means. Defeating the Soviets? Killing every living thing in the country? What does she think "finishing the job" means?
Hmmmm.... well, what happened in Christine's imagination is pretty much the opposite of what really happened historically.
The Soviets pulled out in 1989, leaving our guys in charge. These US allies, "Freedom Fighters" (as Reagan called them) armed to the teeth with American weapons and money, did not disappear, nor were they defeated by the Soviet Union. Instead they stayed in charge, which was the US military objective under Reagan, and you might know them. At the time they were called "Mujahadeen" but you might know them better as "Al Quaida" or "The Taliban" both of which grew out of Reagan's "freedom fighters" movements, and today are fighting our soldiers over there with weapons supplied by our own government.
Another classic Christine whopper came in the midst of a confused and kooky tangent in which she continued to pursue her accusation that her opponent is a "Bearded Marxist". For one thing, Coons pointed out, he's "not now, nor have I ever been, anything but a clean-shaven capitalist!"
Apparently her argument is that he must be a Marxist because "when you look at his position on things like raising taxes, which is one of the tenets of Marxism, not supporting eliminating the death tax, which is a tenet of Marxism -- I would argue that there are more people who support my Catholic faith than his Marxist beliefs,"
Where to begin? Firstly, there are many Communist Catholics. I visited their large Catholic churches in Communist Cuba a few years back when Fidel Castro was still president. The worshippers I met there told me they love Cuba's communist system as it keeps them fed, housed, employed and medically cared for for life, and in todays modern world has long ago legalized their religious practices which despite being previously frowned upon are now officially considered a valued part of Cuba's cultural heritage.
Here in the USA you may be familiar with socialist and radically pacifist catholic groups that have been active and prominent for over a hundred years, such as the Catholic Worker, the Ploughshares movement, and many more.
Secondly, since when did "raising taxes" become "one of the tenets of Marxism"?!
I've read the Communist Manifesto and Das Kapital, and no-where in either of his classic works does Marx say anything about raising taxes.
Actually Marx called for worker ownership and control of all resources and production facilities. In a Marxist society, all profits from large scale organized economic activity are shared by the workers and allocated by their Soviet committees... oh well, no point trying to explain economic theories to someone who chooses to be anti-intellectual and rejects book-learnin' in general.
And here's a doozy. We all know Christine says women and girls who have been victims of rape and incest should not be allowed to get an abortion but should be legally forced to give birth to their rapists baby, their fathers baby or whatever. Equal rights for sperm! Menstruation is murder... ok, she didn't say that, but logically her ideas are equivalent to those extreme caricature statements.
So she says it's a "scare tactic" to bring up rape and incest because they constitute (according to her) "one percent of all abortions performed in America." So rape victims rights are not important because they are in the minority? 25% of all American women are raped in their lifetimes. So 25% of women, Christine says you are a "scare tactic"
I'll leave you for a moment with a pretty good little CBS summary, including some great quotes from naked transparent lies and idiocy such as on China's secret invasion plans she said on TV she knew about "They misquoted me at the time I believe"... you misquoted yourself?!
And the simply brilliant "What I believe is irrelevant" (regarding her belief that evolution is a myth) She and many of her opponents agree that her more whacky beliefs and factually questionable statements are "irrelevant" but here at CTTW we beg to differ.
When someone is a US Senator, their beliefs, their intelligence, their education and their honesty or dishonesty are of the utmost importance to all of us.
We need to know what our leaders think and believe because they make our laws.
How is this irrelevant?
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Apple daily sums up CTTW's campaign in animated form... and hilarity ensues.
I swear on a stack of witches that I am going to get serious and do some straight faced reporting here soon, but I can't resist the manic jollity of the good people at Apple Daily, who's current events cartoons have been on fire lately! Enjoy as Keith Toblerone of MSNBC summarizes one and narrates the other part of their well targeted take on Christine's nutty ideas.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Sunday is fun day, my I don't have to run day: parodies of Christine
As a witch finder, I like to respect the Sabbath. Any Sabbath really, I'll take a day off any way I can get it. So, for a relaxing Sunday break, here's a selection of the recent Christine related comedy from the magic moving picture box.
In honor of this weekends Restoring Sanity and Keeping Fear Alive dueling rallies in Washington DC, we begin with my personal favorite going back many years, even before the Daily Show... the magnificent man who made the world safe for real satire: Professor Dr. Stephen T. Colbert DFA with the Delaword!
Here's the Great and Powerful Jon Stewart from the irreplaceable Daily Show
with a recent piece from 10-06-10
And here's the long version with a fascinating journey back and forth across the border of North Delaware and South Delaware... and Jon gets specific with CTTW at 3:15
and back on September 20th, the birthday of this ye ole blogge... sniff... it's grown up so fast!
For the sake of completeness I am including the popular Saturday Night Live sketches, but they are in my view inferior to the clips above, so be warned, but if you must see the water cooler clips so you won't be ostracized from mainstream society here they are:
Here's the latest from SNL, I like the idea, but unfortunately all of the jokes in this one were done previously by other shows, except for the first one, which I like very much.
This Saturday Night Live season opener starts off with promise but then devolves... meh... why make up stuff about her when the real stuff is so much crazier than anything you can make up?
Finally, this one's my favorite of the SNL stuff so far. I like it because it's not simple parody, it's real satire, if a bit silly and bit longer than necessary.
Politically Correct: An Evening With Camille Paglia-Two Episodes [VHS]
Women in Delaware Politics: Women State Legislators in Delaware, Ruth Ann Minner, Christine O'donnell, Dorothy Andrews Elston Kabis
In honor of this weekends Restoring Sanity and Keeping Fear Alive dueling rallies in Washington DC, we begin with my personal favorite going back many years, even before the Daily Show... the magnificent man who made the world safe for real satire: Professor Dr. Stephen T. Colbert DFA with the Delaword!
| The Colbert Report | Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c | |||
| The Delawert Report | ||||
| ||||
Here's the Great and Powerful Jon Stewart from the irreplaceable Daily Show
with a recent piece from 10-06-10
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Daily Show: 10/6/10 in :60 Seconds | ||||
| ||||
And here's the long version with a fascinating journey back and forth across the border of North Delaware and South Delaware... and Jon gets specific with CTTW at 3:15
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Indecision 2010 - Divided Delaware | ||||
| ||||
and back on September 20th, the birthday of this ye ole blogge... sniff... it's grown up so fast!
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Right Club | ||||
| ||||
For the sake of completeness I am including the popular Saturday Night Live sketches, but they are in my view inferior to the clips above, so be warned, but if you must see the water cooler clips so you won't be ostracized from mainstream society here they are:
Here's the latest from SNL, I like the idea, but unfortunately all of the jokes in this one were done previously by other shows, except for the first one, which I like very much.
This Saturday Night Live season opener starts off with promise but then devolves... meh... why make up stuff about her when the real stuff is so much crazier than anything you can make up?
Finally, this one's my favorite of the SNL stuff so far. I like it because it's not simple parody, it's real satire, if a bit silly and bit longer than necessary.
Politically Correct: An Evening With Camille Paglia-Two Episodes [VHS]
Women in Delaware Politics: Women State Legislators in Delaware, Ruth Ann Minner, Christine O'donnell, Dorothy Andrews Elston Kabis
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Welcome Ed Heads! Big Eddie exposes more madness and corruption
I want to send out a very special and heartfelt welcome and thank you to Big Ed Schultz and the whole Ed Head Family out there! You are making a difference people.
Ed's new show on MSNBC has brought out vital issues and voices that have never been heard or seen on national TV before, and America is a better place since he came on the air.
Here's a classic example, Ed's latest excellent report on CTTW and her ill ilk.
Here at the electronic political witch hunt that is CTTW, we love you Ed and all Ed Heads everywhere, keep spreading the truth and challenging the rich and powerful! And thanks for visiting CTTW, your one stop shop for the regressive and willfully ignorant ideas of an amusing but dangerous candidates for cash like Christine.
Ed's new show on MSNBC has brought out vital issues and voices that have never been heard or seen on national TV before, and America is a better place since he came on the air.
Here's a classic example, Ed's latest excellent report on CTTW and her ill ilk.
Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy
Here at the electronic political witch hunt that is CTTW, we love you Ed and all Ed Heads everywhere, keep spreading the truth and challenging the rich and powerful! And thanks for visiting CTTW, your one stop shop for the regressive and willfully ignorant ideas of an amusing but dangerous candidates for cash like Christine.
Christine sees things visible only to her: Hillary for president ads? Have you seen them? She says she has!
Oh Christine, one of your many magical charms is your bewitching ability to see and hear things that only you can see and hear. We've been told you heard "The audible word of God" during the campaign, now you tell us you can see into an occult world of invisible TV ads. As a professional witch-locator, I can tell you that none of this lends credence to a recent TV ad of your own, in which you claimed "I'm not a witch!" Well, we did do the nose... and the hat...
But only the sorceress herself can see the things she sees:
But only the sorceress herself can see the things she sees:
Thursday, October 7, 2010
CTTW says: Condoms cause AIDS, Cancer is an act of God, Sex-Ed is porn, people With AIDS are like bank robbers
Why on heaven or earth would anyone headline this clip with her claim that AIDS gets too much funding? True it's outrageous, inaccurate and offensive to say that, but talk about burying the lead! Condoms and talking about public health cause AIDS? "no behavior will make you contract cancer, it's just an act of God" and "The caller makes an excellent point" that people suffering with AIDS are like bank robbers who got shot robbing a bank are pretty darn shocking if you ask me.
And she always has so many great fun facts that nobody but her has ever heard of before. In this clip it's that AIDS funding is not being used for lifesaving drugs, that saying otherwise is causing AIDS to spread? She never quits. Gotta love the way she can say hateful, heartless, murderous things in a way that seems so childlike and innocent.
And she always has so many great fun facts that nobody but her has ever heard of before. In this clip it's that AIDS funding is not being used for lifesaving drugs, that saying otherwise is causing AIDS to spread? She never quits. Gotta love the way she can say hateful, heartless, murderous things in a way that seems so childlike and innocent.
Monday, October 4, 2010
"I'm not a witch!" Christine claims in new ad. That's what they all say.
I can barely keep up. I still have a large backlog of her mania, but this was just too delicious of a morsel to resist.
It seems Christine has found a need to respond to our brave work exposing her witchiness.
Nice try, CTTW, you are only digging yourself in deeper. It's too late to take back your own confession on national television "Yes, I was a witch. I practiced witchcraft... I dabbled in witch craft, one of my first dates with a witch was on a satanic altar... there was a little bit of blood on there and everything.... I'm not making this stuff up"
Guilty as charged. At least according to her own words. Yet now she tries to reverse herself.
The funniest thing about this ad is the opening line. Watch it again and again, it gets funnier every time.
The scariest thing about this ad is the intended tag line. No, not "I am not a witch" but rather "I'm you" Don't let her cast her Satanic hex upon you, good people! She is not you!
You are yourself, likely a relatively sane and honest person. You are nothing like her.
I love it. Once again, CTTW is convicted by her own testimony. She claims "I'm not what you've heard" .... you mean you're not what we've heard from you? From the words emitted by your very own mouth? Everything bad we've heard about Christine, as evidenced in this very ye ole blogge, has come from her own public statements.
Nobody made you earn your living going on TV to promote yourself and your various devolutionary and seemingly delusional ideas.
Ah, Christine. Just try and deny that you're a witch. That's only going to convince more people of the truth, which as a witch locator, your humble blogger is beating the electronic pavement to make sure we know in advance.
It seems Christine has found a need to respond to our brave work exposing her witchiness.
Nice try, CTTW, you are only digging yourself in deeper. It's too late to take back your own confession on national television "Yes, I was a witch. I practiced witchcraft... I dabbled in witch craft, one of my first dates with a witch was on a satanic altar... there was a little bit of blood on there and everything.... I'm not making this stuff up"
Guilty as charged. At least according to her own words. Yet now she tries to reverse herself.
The funniest thing about this ad is the opening line. Watch it again and again, it gets funnier every time.
The scariest thing about this ad is the intended tag line. No, not "I am not a witch" but rather "I'm you" Don't let her cast her Satanic hex upon you, good people! She is not you!
You are yourself, likely a relatively sane and honest person. You are nothing like her.
I love it. Once again, CTTW is convicted by her own testimony. She claims "I'm not what you've heard" .... you mean you're not what we've heard from you? From the words emitted by your very own mouth? Everything bad we've heard about Christine, as evidenced in this very ye ole blogge, has come from her own public statements.
Nobody made you earn your living going on TV to promote yourself and your various devolutionary and seemingly delusional ideas.
Ah, Christine. Just try and deny that you're a witch. That's only going to convince more people of the truth, which as a witch locator, your humble blogger is beating the electronic pavement to make sure we know in advance.
So now she's not just a witch (or Satanist?), she's a secret agent spy leaking China's US invasion plans?!
This just in! Ap is reporting that CTTW's BS is more amazingly full of bull than we realized.
Will the hilarious lies ever end? Straight from 2006, she said she had secret info about China's US takeover plans, yet she leaked the info in the debate at the time.
So either she's lying again, or she's spilling state secrets in political debates.
Which is it Christine?
Will the hilarious lies ever end? Straight from 2006, she said she had secret info about China's US takeover plans, yet she leaked the info in the debate at the time.
So either she's lying again, or she's spilling state secrets in political debates.
Which is it Christine?
Saturday, October 2, 2010
UPDATED VIDEO: Christine says eating meatballs was more important to her than religion.
This week Bill Maher released another witch clip which offers us a tasty treat... and that's a one a spicy meat-ball!
Christine here reveals that eating meatballs was more important to her than God, when she says she decided not to stick with the Hare Krishna consciousness movement because she needed to "eat meatballs".
This is part of a classic riff about her many youthful "dabblings". Apparently she tried 'em all before deciding that her favorite flavor was Jesus; Buddhism, Hare Krishna, Flying Spaghetti Monsterism (I assume), Witchcraft (still unclear whether she means wicca, or some other paganism or deism or whether it really was Satanism after all, what with the blood sacrifice midnight dating picnic dropcloth.) Perhaps even Tarvuism. More on that below.
Since she became a nationally known professional anti-sex celebrity "Christian" since her college days, one wonders when she had time for all this. Conclusion? She had to have been one of those wild try-anything girls in high school.
"Hey Christine, wanna come over and platonically make out (without lust of course) on my Satanic sacrificial altar? I know I'm a witch but I've been dabbling in Satanism lately so I thought you'd enjoy letting me "date" you on my blood soaked tablecloth here... Yes? You'll try anything once or twice or three times? Cool. You're a really good sport."
I'm going to have to save her fabricated educational resume for another posting.
In the meantime, enjoy a glimpse into the wonderful world of Tarvu. While CTTW was dabbling away in high school, she must certainly have dabbled a tiny dibble into Tarvuism, the world's fastest growing religion. Wouldn't you like to talk to an octopus? I know I would! Hebbo!
And, coming soon, I have found an early published essay by CTTW herself, on the delicious subject of virginity vs. chastity. Followers of this ye ole blogge will know that I'm using all my witch-locating abilities to try to discern whether CTTW is a born again virgin or if she has any idea what she's talking about when she discusses her favorite subject, SEX !!!
(How's that for a teaser?)
Ok, I can't resist, just one more little dose of Tarvu. It's so easy to join!
Christine here reveals that eating meatballs was more important to her than God, when she says she decided not to stick with the Hare Krishna consciousness movement because she needed to "eat meatballs".
This is part of a classic riff about her many youthful "dabblings". Apparently she tried 'em all before deciding that her favorite flavor was Jesus; Buddhism, Hare Krishna, Flying Spaghetti Monsterism (I assume), Witchcraft (still unclear whether she means wicca, or some other paganism or deism or whether it really was Satanism after all, what with the blood sacrifice midnight dating picnic dropcloth.) Perhaps even Tarvuism. More on that below.
Since she became a nationally known professional anti-sex celebrity "Christian" since her college days, one wonders when she had time for all this. Conclusion? She had to have been one of those wild try-anything girls in high school.
"Hey Christine, wanna come over and platonically make out (without lust of course) on my Satanic sacrificial altar? I know I'm a witch but I've been dabbling in Satanism lately so I thought you'd enjoy letting me "date" you on my blood soaked tablecloth here... Yes? You'll try anything once or twice or three times? Cool. You're a really good sport."
I'm going to have to save her fabricated educational resume for another posting.
In the meantime, enjoy a glimpse into the wonderful world of Tarvu. While CTTW was dabbling away in high school, she must certainly have dabbled a tiny dibble into Tarvuism, the world's fastest growing religion. Wouldn't you like to talk to an octopus? I know I would! Hebbo!
Say Hebbo! from Torvakian on Vimeo.
And, coming soon, I have found an early published essay by CTTW herself, on the delicious subject of virginity vs. chastity. Followers of this ye ole blogge will know that I'm using all my witch-locating abilities to try to discern whether CTTW is a born again virgin or if she has any idea what she's talking about when she discusses her favorite subject, SEX !!!
(How's that for a teaser?)
Ok, I can't resist, just one more little dose of Tarvu. It's so easy to join!
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